Sumo Haiku 2: Second (Terunofuji, Kaisei, Daishomaru, Okinoumi)

Whether you’re a faithful reader or just someone who stumbled into this space, welcome to the second day of my Sumo Haiku project!

I’m enjoying this project. I would love for others to see and appreciate the beauty of Sumo as well as that of haiku.

If you haven’t seen it already, click here to read Sumo Haiku Day One with its introductory, explanatory opening text. I’ll go ahead and re-post the disclaimer part here, though:

[DISCLAIMER: In these haiku, you’ll read purely fictitious portrayals of the wrestlers, simple whims of my imagination as I considered each one. I actually know nothing of the inner lives and selves of these guys.]

I’ll introduce each haiku with the name and photo of the wrestler. The haiku about that wrestler will appear beneath his photo.

Enjoy!

 

Sumo Haiku 2: Second (Terunofuji, Kaisei, Daishomaru, Okinoumi)

(by Kristi Garboushian)

Terunofuji:

 

  1. Terunofuji

Ancestral fighter

redolent of sandalwood:

the older brother.

 

Kaisei:

 

2. Kaisei

No expectations.

He doesn’t want to offer

anything that asks.

 

Daishomaru:

 

3. Daishomaru

…adores reading and

inviting consequences

into rooms of art.

 

Okinoumi:

 

4. Okinoumi

He looks in their eyes

like he’s gazing at his death.

He rarely wears gold.

 

 

Sumo Haiku 1: First Four (Mitakeumi, Endo, Tochinoshin, Asanoyama)

In February 2016, I started writing a series of haiku, some of which I posted here in TALC. I didn’t post all 76 of the haiku I wrote between February and August that year, but I did share a few, each accompanied by a photo.

It’s now February four years later. Considering that February is National Haiku Writing Month (NaHaiWriMo) and that the next Grand Sumo Tournament (basho) is less than three weeks away, I wanted to write some haiku about Sumo. Haiku is a Japanese poetic form. Sumo is Japan’s national sport. I’m a big fan of both.

Sumo-related haiku could come from any number of angles, but what came to my mind in a moment of reflection was the idea of imagining the inner lives and selves of Sumo wrestlers (rikishi), like when you’re people-watching and your need for amusement spawns backstories for some of the humans you notice.

I selected my 16 favorite Sumo wrestlers with the intention of creating fictional personas for each of them. Between now and the end of the month – there are four more TALC posting days in February – you’ll see four haiku sets, each containing four haiku about four different wrestlers, one for each of them. The poems are short, as haiku traditionally consist of 17 syllables distributed across three lines. (I personally enjoy working within this tradition.)

Some of you are here for the poetry. Some of you might be Sumo fans, but I’m guessing that most of you are not. For those of you who’ve no special affection for either poetry or Sumo… yes, I went and combined the two! Thank you for bearing with me here today, and, in advance, on Thursday, and also on next week Tuesday and Thursday. [::sheepish grin::]

[DISCLAIMER: In these haiku, you’ll read purely fictitious portrayals of the wrestlers, simple whims of my imagination as I considered each one. I actually know nothing of the inner lives and selves of these guys.]

I’ll introduce each haiku with the name and photo of the wrestler. The haiku about that wrestler will appear beneath his photo.

Enjoy!

 

Sumo Haiku 1: First Four (Mitakeumi, Endo, Tochinoshin, Asanoyama)

(by Kristi Garboushian)

Mitakeumi:

 

  1. Mitakeumi

Maybe he believes

that evil fairies exist,

love notwithstanding.

 

Endo:

 

  1. Endo

“He’s the pretty one” –

I think, Goth, black eye-liner,

cold night, street light mist.

 

Tochinoshin:

 

  1. Tochinoshin

Mountains wake and roar

ten minutes into his sound

sleep. He’ll sometimes dream.

 

Asanoyama:

 

  1. Asanoyama

Perhaps amber ale.

Watery, late-summer fruit.

“Metrosexual.”

 

 

It’s about time! (Gym updates! First of 2020.)

I’ve been on a mission to get back into a fitness routine. It’s happening. Here are the changes:

1). No more Monday morning Body Pump. I’m doing a class called “Ropes and Cardio” on Mondays, instead. I did it for the first time this week, and it kicked my ass, which is going to happen when your ass hasn’t done cardio in almost a year and you’ve never picked up a battle rope in your life. This class is insane. I love it. I’ll go into further detail in an actual class review, maybe, after another two-three classes.

2). Now that I’m solidly back in Body Pump, I could pick up my regular weights again, but I’m sticking with the super light weights I used the first day I got back a week ago Saturday. Why? Because it’s different, and because I’m fascinated by the fact that I feel a slight post-workout burn in my muscles even after using the ridiculously light weights. It’s a new year, and this is my new gym thing, apparently. Do not increase my weights! Talk about a plot twist.

3). I’m walking two-six miles on whatever non-gym day fits my week (and not on a treadmill). I’m using the Accupedo app on my phone instead of a fitbit or other some such. Accupedo shows me everything I need to know. I tell it when I’m starting my walk, and it tracks my pace, steps, miles, calories burned, date, place, time, active time, and total time, and it shows a graph of my workout and also a map of where I walked! It takes from Google maps. It’s kind of creepy, but I’m kind of really digging it.

I’m happy with this new schedule and plan starting out the new year. It feels good doing cardio twice a week and light weights twice a week, as opposed to most of last year’s three heavier-weight Body Pump classes with no cardio.

I’m seriously jonsing for Body Combat, though. If I can find a way back into a Combat class….

Eight splendiferous weeks of workouts lie before me, and then I’ll be out for a month again. I’m having my second gum-grafting surgery (bottom row this time) on April 13. That surgery will be more invasive than the last one, I’ve been told. I’ll have a stent in my mouth post-op and likely even more bruises on my face, and, yeah, no one will be seeing me for a while. Once I’ve recovered from that, though, it’s going to be hard to keep me away from the gym.

For those who requested it, today’s selfie was taken yesterday in my car after my Body Pump workout.

 

My hair is amused.

 

Happy Friday Eve!

 

Favorites of 2019! (Late, but I’m a month behind on the new year.)

Hi, this is me outdoing myself on being late. I’m finally getting around to posting the “Favorites of My Favorite Little Things in 2019” list I’d planned on doing since December. Since 2020 just began for me when I made it back to the gym at the beginning of February, I’m finally here with the list!

The biggest part of the list is the products section, because I discovered quite a few holy grail, ride-or-die products in 2019. You’ll find that at the bottom of the list; I’m presenting these favorites in the same order I always do in my “favorites” lists: movies, series, food, products.

If you’re interested, take a look at my favorite “little things” of 2019!

Top three favorite theater movies: 
Parasite (October)
Joker (October)
Ford v. Ferrari (November)

In total, I saw nine movies in theaters in 2019. My top three favorites were the three I went to see in the fall.

Midsommar’s  artistic merits deem it top-three worthy, but Midsommar being Midsommar, its excellence made it unbearable for me. A cheesier, less deftly handled production may have made it more watchable. As it is, even the trailer still sends me into a panic. Why do I keep going back to watch the trailer?! There are scenes in the trailer that don’t even appear in the movie! Also, the trailer gives nothing away; one is in no way prepared for Midsommar’s atrocities after watching the trailer. I think it’s the music, the sound of the string instruments in the trailer that freak me out. Why am I rambling on about Midsommar when it’s not on my list? Ugh.

Moving on…

Favorite of the few movies I watched at home:
Train to Busan (Netflix). It’s now my favorite zombie film.

Favorite streaming T.V. series:
From Netflix: You, Dead to Me, Love, Death + Robots, After Life, and La Casa De Papel
From Hulu: Reprisal
From Amazon Prime Video: Fleabag and The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

Favorite athletic event:
The May 2019 Grand Sumo Tournament (Natsu Basho) Grand Sumo Highlights. This was the tournament in which Tochinoshin, my favorite wrestler, earned back his Ozeki rank.

 

World-class sumo wrestler Tochinoshin (Levan Gorgadze of Georgia)

 

Favorite miscellaneous project to watch:
Rihanna’s Savage X Fenty Show (Amazon Prime Video)

Favorite processed food discoveries:
Birch Benders Plant Protein Pancake and Waffle Mix
Crunchy/toasted chickpeas with sea salt
Vega Protein Nutrition Shakes (especially the chocolate one)

Favorite skincare/cosmetic product discoveries*:
Earth Science Creamy Fruit Oil Cleanser A-D-E
Acure brightening facial scrub
Nourish Organic Lightweight Moisturizing Face Lotion
Schmidt’s Bergamot and Lime Natural Deodorant**
e.l.f. Radiant Gel Lip Stains
e.l.f. 16HR Camo Concealer
NYX Bare With Me Tinted Skin Veil
Jason Powersmile Anti-Cavity and Whitening Gel

*All vegan and cruelty-free

**I’d put a different deodorant as a favorite on December’s list, and it was my new favorite… until I developed an allergic reaction to it. I had to toss it. I picked up another of the Schmidt’s, and I’m glad to be using it again. It works fine, and I love its bergamot and lime scent! I probably won’t deviate from it again.

Favorite random little thing:
Bat birthday card (by Brace)

 

Bat birthday card by Brace

 

I don’t know what it is about this card. No one gave it to me. I came across it and I had to have it in my life and so I got it and it still makes me inexplicably happy. The front reads, “It’s when you can’t hear the bats, that’s when the bats are coming.” The inside reads, “Other than that, I have no birthday advice.”

On that note, I’ll bid you a happy rest of your day or night. I hope 2020 is off to a great start for you!

 

 

Campy. Tasty. Ethical. (January Favorites!)

January’s “favorite little things” theme involved easily digested entertainment, sweet munchies, and a couple of products. January wasn’t all that bad. Check out what I’ve got for you today!

 

1). The Witcher (Netflix)

 

 

Exaggerated video game/graphic novel aesthetics (The Witcher had already been delivered in both of those mediums) contribute to the comic-book style of this fantastical series. Where some see The Witcher in comparison to Game of Thrones, I see it as the adopted lovechild of Lord of the Rings, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, and Lee Child’s Jack Reacher novels.

As I’d commented to a friend, from what I’ve read online, there are two types of Game of Thrones fans: those who can’t watch The Witcher because of GoT, and those who love The Witcher. (Callaghan is a huge fan of GoT, and he enjoyed The Witcher.) It’s funny how a series can polarize a fandom of another series! I love humans. Whatever your case, The Witcher is done well from an artistic standpoint, so there’s that. I also appreciate and resonate with its thought-provoking tagline, “The worst monsters are the ones we create.”

 

2). American Horror Story – 1984 (S9)

 

 

Continuing on with campy entertainment to be enjoyed at home, we’ve got American Horror Story – 1984, which came out last fall. We finally got around to it in January! It’s unabashedly cheesy, and I loved everything about it; 1984 instantly landed in my top-three favorite AHS seasons.

 

3). Good Girls (S2) (Netflix)

 

 

Good Girls is the series you turn to when you want a crime thriller, a comedy, and a light watch. It’s well-cast with actors who can act, but as usual, I especially enjoyed the performances of Christina Hendricks and Retta.

 

4). Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (S3)

 

 

We were also happy to have a new season of Sabrina. The series gets darker, sappier, and more complicated in season three, and we were into it.

Come to think of it, we didn’t watch anything heavy in January. It was all magic, monsters, and ridiculous shenanigans… a fabulous tone to strike in the first month of the new decade, and appropriate for the times, at that!

 

5). Ten Second Songs (YouTube channel)

So there’s this guy named Anthony Vincent on YouTube. He’s a phenomenal music talent who plays numerous instruments very well, and he can sing like, well, everyone, apparently. In YouTube favorites this month, I bring you his channel: “Ten Second Songs.” From video to video, I’m endlessly entertained. One thing he does is he takes this challenge: he picks a song requested by a viewer, and he sings/performs it in the style of other musicians, also requested by viewers. You don’t need to be familiar with the songs or the musicians Vincent covers, as he’s hilarious and awesome to watch, regardless, but it’s especially fun when you do know the songs and musicians he’s covering. Here are a couple of examples of his cover challenges:

Disturbed’s “Down With The Sickness” (I know the song because I’m big a Disturbed fan):

 

 

Katy Perry’s “Dark Horse” (I know the song because of Body Combat):

 

 

6). Mountain Dew Zero Sugar commercial (As Good As The Original) – The Shining edition

 

 

I love almost everything about this most excellent commercial. The only thing about it I don’t like is the product it’s touting, but who cares what it’s about when you have Bryan Cranston, Tracee Ellis Ross, and The Shining. I never get tired of this.

 

7). CLIF Bar – Sweet & Salty Chocolate Chunk with Sea Salt

Chocolate Chunk with Sea Salt CLIF Bar

 

I’d lost my ability to taste while I was sick in January, but I could taste sweet. One sweet I particularly got into was this variety of CLIF bar. Chocolate Chunk with Sea Salt is delicious.

 

8). Ricola The Original Natural Herb Cough Drops

 

Ricola The Original Natural Herb Cough Drops

 

I don’t have much to say about these cough drops beyond 1). they helped, and 2). they didn’t taste terrible. I actually like this flavor! I always have a few in my bag now. You never know when you’ll need a cough drop.

 

9). Hello Activated Charcoal with Fresh Mint + Coconut Oil Epic Whitening Fluoride Toothpaste

 

Hello Activated Charcoal with Fresh Mint + Coconut Oil Epic Whitening Fluoride Toothpaste

 

I discovered this toothpaste as I was researching teeth-whitening products. I’m glad I gave it a try! It actually works, and it’s fun to brush with black toothpaste. You end up with a mouthful of ghoulish zombie teeth, and then you get to spit black stuff into the sink. It tastes like a minty toothpaste with a hint of barbeque (not BBQ foods, but the actual BBQ), and it’s just slightly gritty in texture. Love this stuff. I brush with it after brushing with my normal JASON toothpaste. I don’t mind brushing twice.

 

10). Sally Hansen Pure Vegan Nail Polish

 

Sally Hansen Pure Vegan Nail Polish

 

For the first time, a mainstream drugstore nail polish brand has a line of vegan nail polishes! Sally Hansen has stepped into the future. It’s good nail polish, too.

 

This brings us to The End. Didn’t I just say “Happy Friday Eve”? I’m saying it again!

 

 

Anecdotally, (+ I went back to the gym!)

I’ve been feeling better little by little, and I’ve been released to roam around outside of the house.  Outside of the house rocks my world. Outside of the house this morning meant that I finally took my car, Dysis, out for the spa day I’ve been promising her. That is, I took her to the car wash. And I took myself to get my bangs trimmed. And I took myself to the V.A. for my annual DEXA scan. The guy behind the radiology counter said, “Miss Kristi! We might as well get you a desk back here!” Because today was my fifth visit to radiology in the last month. Haha!

Outside of the house happened on Saturday, and also on Sunday. I took backyard selfies on Sunday afternoon after I got home.

 

Facing the shade with February aloe vera.

 

Let me tell you about Saturday, though. It was the first day of February, and I went back to the gym for the first time since December. Body Pump! I kept five-pound plates on my barbell as my heaviest weight because five weeks is a long time to be sedentary. It was a good call – I started feeling the post-workout pain that evening. Glorious, finallygotoffmyass post-workout pain.

Yesterday was Monday, and I did not go to the gym again as I’d planned. I woke up in the morning and cancelled my booking for Body Pump because the act of opening my eyes riled up my cough immediately, which was good, because…

I suddenly realized that my gym regimen could do with a change. Having finally set foot in a gym, 2020 is just now starting as far as I’m concerned, so it’s a good time for a change, and… why not?

After reviewing my options online, I decided that I’ll ditch Monday morning Body Pump for Monday morning Ropes and Cardio, a class that allegedly works you out with battle ropes and cardio segments thrown into the hour. You know I’ll be reporting on my experience with it, because it’ll be something totally new to me.

Morning Body Combat classes are scarce despite all of my gym’s locations. I miss it. In any case, though, it’s time to get back into cardio. I haven’t done it in over six months.

See you on Thursday with my list of January Favorites!

 

 

Henry Cavill is Jack Reacher.

Well! Author Lee Child is retiring and handing Jack Reacher over to his brother, who will continue to write Reacher novels. I read about this with a great deal of relief. I’d suspected that Child was going to retire soon, and I was not looking forward to Reacher’s death day. With this new arrangement, Reacher will survive Child’s retirement! Thank you for saving Reacher for us, Lee Child!

Even more exciting, Lee Child himself is working with Amazon Prime to bring us a Jack Reacher series (!!!) with a Reacher that we loyal fans will love, and this brings me to the crux of today’s post. They’re looking for an actor to play Reacher, and I have a suggestion.

I’d previously written that I thought Bradley Cooper could be a contender for the role of Jack Reacher. Let’s just forget I ever wrote that, because that was before I (obsessively) watched The Witcher on Netflix.

In The Witcher, Henry Cavill plays the lead role of Geralt of Rivia, who is Jack Reacher in another dimension.

In my mind, Cavill isn’t a mere contender for Reacher. He IS Reacher.

 

Henry Cavill as Geralt of Rivia in “The Witcher”

 

Geralt of Rivia travels around, gets himself embroiled in situations, and brings down monsters, just like Reacher.

 

Henry Cavill

 

Geralt of Rivia’s “hmm” is the equivalent of “Reacher said nothing.” Watch the two-minute video below to hear his “hmm” in various contexts. It’s a versatile “said nothing,” for sure. You get more than just “hmm” in the video, though. The video captures 23 specific seconds of pure Reacher.

If you only have 23 seconds to spare for this video, go to:

0:18 – 0:28 for a sample of Reacher dialogue delivery and a classic Reacher moment.
0:43 – 0:56 for another listen to his voice and another classic Reacher moment.

 

 

Cavill has a deep, full voice that’s effortlessly menacing, and thunderous when needed. Like Reacher’s.

As for specs? Henry Cavill is 6′,1″. No problem. Put 4″ custom lifts in his shoes to make him 6′,5″ if it’s necessary for this otherwise perfect Reacher to stand exactly that tall. He certainly wouldn’t be the first actor to do it. I found an article that points to Vin Diesel, Sylvester Stallone, Russell Crowe, Mark Wahlberg, John Wayne, etc. as actors who’ve worn lifts to appear taller than they are… allegedly, anyway.

Cavill’s weight probably changes from role to role, but his walking-around weight is irrelevant. He has a Reacher-perfect frame, build, and overall physique.

 

Henry Cavill

 

Cavill is almost too pretty, but he escapes that deal-breaker with his strong and coarse facial bone structure. He has a face that would lend itself well to any practical-effect make-up needed to uglify him to Reacher standards. He dirties up pretty well, too.

 

Henry Cavill

 

There are details. Reacher’s nose has been described in comparison to a smashed-in pancake, or something to that effect. Cavill can achieve such a look. He has prominent brow ridges that add to his Reacher-appropriate, unrefined appearance.

 

Henry Cavill

 

Outfit Cavill with blue contact lenses. Cut his hair short and bleach it as blond as it is in The Witcher. 

We should also consider that Henry Cavill tends to play heroic and stoic ultra-macho guys, so he has plenty of Reacher-demeanor experience, too.

 

Henry Cavill as Superman. Henry Cavill as Geralt of Rivia in “The Witcher.”

 

Henry Cavill has everything it takes to play Reacher. He’s an actor with a workable Reacher face, of a workable Reacher height. He has an ideal physique and a deep, powerful voice. He can be scary just standing there. He captures Reacher’s demeanor and character traits and “says nothing” better than anyone I’ve seen. In the above-posted video, you’ll note that Cavill can match his facial expression to the context of each “hmm” he utters.

As Geralt of Rivia in The Witcher, Cavill exudes Reacher’s essence to where both Callaghan and I were prompted to remark on it.

Not to mention that Henry Cavill can act, too. No need to go looking for someone who’s exactly 6′,5″ and less of an actor!

Have I missed anything?